my crushes and impacts

there arent many who dislike the film autograph.it is so much a true depiction of individuals.so thers always somthin called puppylove or crush or infatuation or whatever u name it in almost any guy's life.im restricting it to guys here.the thing is that its all bcos of films that we watch,the opposite gender attraction and the age factor.films claim love as the best thing in the world and thats a reason why many guys tend to follow that,i wud certainly say that the proportions wud have been fairly less if ther wasnt many love films.anyways im here about to discuss what that had happend in my life until now.it was during my 5th std when this first crush happened,its seriiously funny when u look at it when ur 23 but if u had been a 13yr old u wud generally feel it as romance.now am nearing 23 and am laughin at it.durin my 5th grade i was in my homwtown and had to go the school nearby,i was so studious and talented then that i was always leading the ranklists or atleast i was a top contender there,i was meritoriously excellent,a good sports kid and had a very good iq.ther was this girl who always got 1st rank by then,so we used to compete for the 2nd rank always,she was so cute,like havin a thick short cut step hairdoo and always had a reeth or hairband or whatever.she was smilin forever and noone wil hate her by then.it was like 5groups were formed and 4 students were alloted under a groupleader for the purpose of studying,no surprises we both were groupleaders.we used to help guys for studies durin the studytime which was wat the role of the gl was.she wud come up and ask doubts about the subjects,specially history,geo...to me.(pls dont laugh here).then she used to talk with me a lot when the guys were studyin,she used to exclaim things usings actions that was always bound to give u a feel good factor.we had a decent time together in clas chatting and crackin jokes(those jokes have now got a new name,"mokkai").one day she came to me when i was about to go to the ground for playin football,she said that was about to leave for u.s in a few months.i wasnt feelin bad bcos she gave me a foreign chocolate and i said 'have a nicetime ther',then she came for clas for almost a week for exams and she fled to u.s,i never really thot about her til a window journey in a longtrip.
then it was the 2nd time,this time i was doin 12th std,she was known to me as we both had been in the same tuitions before,she came to my school for the entrance coachin.she was good tall and a typical southgal.i saw her in my school and was so happy,but dint talk to her since i was too shy to do that,even now iam...she was in my next clas that i always used to roam over ther jus for seein her,her frends have seen this and they used to hide her for fun when i go near the clas.it was nice,then one fine day she met my mom and asked about how my health was and allthose stufs,love is the stupidest thing one can ever have in life,so due to the tamilfilms i saw that was reason enough for me to fall into a crush.i wanted to talk to her desperately,that day hasnt come till now.her house was adjacent to mine and so i used to go ther to my frend's house just to see her go to her colg durin my 12th holidays,i was waitin for engg counsellin and she had joined an arts colg then.i did all the rubbishest things i cud imagine now by then just to see n talk to her.never did i succeed,even my frend tried to help me but i was such a jackass to let go off the oppurtunity.then my colg life started and after then i used to think of her at hostel when i was alone,i hate loneliness and always tried avoidin it.in nick of time i completely rubbed off the crush as a piece of crap.now this was all the crushes i had until now.

regarding the impacts,now this is real serious.here was this gal who had a deep impact in me,i used to admire her for her courage,the gal she was and her way of taking life.she was such a bold woman that i wudnt forget ever in my life,i havent ever faced many difficulties in life,atleast not in higher degree,but she had experienced life not so good till then.but she always moved on and concentrated on what she was doin.im not sure that even now i can do that.she used to tel me about her bad times which i wud always try to cut it out so that she wudnt get bogged down by then.if ther was one human being in life that i wud always wanted to be in tough with except the blood relations that was her.a typical metro gal,the guts she had,the attitude and of all the ability to make decisions on her own was simply a kudos thing.i always prayed mother nature and god that she shud come up well in life which she will.
reg the next person for a change hes a guy,the biggest ever impact in me till date,i cudnt forget him ever,im highly emotional,but not many know this havin seen my exterior.this guy always had a decent and healthy freindship with me and we used to kill hours like anythin.he was a very good human and always was in the lighter mood,never was he so serious about life or anything,he left us all on tamil new year in a horrible night.the night when i was travellin to coimbatore to meet him and speak to him,but he never knew i was comin adn left before i came.all i cud see was himself inside a icebox.he dint talk to me,never did he do that to anybody,the fondest guy of our clas left us all in tears.he still is in our hearts but we miss him for sure.RIP my friend.